Fall is Here (09.18.09)

Fall is here and I am so ready!! Well, technically, the weather is still warm, but my mind is already telling me it's time for a change. Baseball season for my husband just ended, which is always the biggest sign that summer is coming to an end. Brittany is playing softball in a Sacramento Wednesday night league, which is something new for us, but we are loving it.

I am proud to report that I had my 18-month check up and I was 126 lbs., which is close enough to my 1-year weight of 124 lbs. that I am quite happy with that. I also did the 5-day pouch test and it was difficult, but I did it. I relapsed yesterday, buying some of those Special K crackers that you get 17-crackers for 90 calories and promptly overloaded on two thirds of the entire box! lol....But, I've jumped back on the wagon today and have eaten healthy, although today I am having a hard time of it because I am wanting those carbs like no other. Fortunately, I am going to my friends Pampered Chef party tonight and will not be sitting around the house trying to avoid the 1/3 box of crackers that are calling my name so loudly, I can hear it from here and I'm at work. That's a very loud yell!!

Life has definitely improved lately, with Lou working. A big stress has been lifted from my shoulders. I find, to my utter dismay, that I like to eat just as much when I'm happy as when I'm stressed out. The difference is, I am more able to contain myself and fight the old habits that want to come back when I am busy and I am happy. Boredom remains all of ours worst enemies and having weight loss surgery does not change that. This week, I have been gone from home every night of the week and that keeps me focused on eating healthy, when I have to actually THINK about what I'm going to eat instead of randomly popping food into my mouth. Junk food is just way too much pressure and not even something I enjoy any more.

Yesterday, I had a rough afternoon. The early part of the day was fine, and I was working with our consultant, which keeps me busy. However, the afternoon turned ugly when I backed into my bosses truck as I was leaving work. There's no excuse for it. I was STUPID!! I even noticed he was parked further back than usual. However, I sat down in my car, was messing with my radio and my cell phone, thinking about what I needed to get at the store and wondering if I had enough money on me to get what I needed and then promptly backed into his truck. Fortunately, it didn't do any damage to his vehicle except a little scratch on the bumper. My car, however, has a long gash on the back door on the drivers side. So, I was so pissed at myself and I was hungry because I'd forgot to bring any snacks to work yesterday, so I stopped at Target to get what I needed for dinner and saw the box of crackers and the rest, my friends, is history. When I got home, I'd already eaten a third of the box (and Target is like one mile from my front door!). I tried making some home made biscuits, which turned out saltier than I liked, then I promptly spilled cherry kool-aid all over my foot and the kitchen floor. So, I ate dinner and I went to bed at 7pm, just so I wouldn't do any more damage to myself. Oh, and I had an ice cream cone too ... and I'm not talking diet, either. So, thank goodness yesterday was a rare day and today has been a good day so far and I've followed my dietary guidelines without issue. It's amazing how just having the right foods on hand helps. Too bad I couldn't have had this train of thought BEFORE I got fat. But, I know I'm not alone in that battle.

I hope this blog helps any of you that need a little extra boost now and then and I hope that you understand that we all struggle. Even people that have had surgery still have struggles. Gastric bypass or weight loss surgery is not a cure-all. We all still have to struggle to maintain that weight loss once our bodies heal and those old habits fight hard to come back. This is a battle we will have the rest of our lives. The surgery is our tool to help us, but it requires work and dedication on our part to make that tool work the right way.

Happy Fall everyone! I hope you all are enjoying the slightly cooler weather and are looking forward to the coming holidays....wait, did I say holidays??? OHHHH NOOOOOOO!!!!

Til next time ...